Part 11: Music as the Teacher Guru

Meditation came into my life as a gift when I needed it most. Fascinatingly as a child, I always felt an affinity with Asian culture, Japanese in particular. Although Chinese, at one point a hand size ceramic Confucius appeared in my life. I do not have a recollection of where it came from but I felt a soothing, welcoming and knowing attraction and fondness toward it. 
Some insights of meditation started to come in 1984 when I was twenty-four. My living situations up to this point for the past few years had been in shared housing with friends, generally musicians. I had moved back to my parents home so that I could save more money and invest in recording gear. Things were very different then in terms of the costs for analog recording equipment which was very costly. Here is the funny thing - my dad was so into being a father exemplifying loving responsibility to help and aid his children that he pretty much thought nothing of assisting financially where and however he could within his means. He helped tremendously with this adventure into beginning to develop the music that was burning within me and so longing to be expressed. I was developing strong and clear musical concepts and knew that this was my direction and path. What makes this so interesting is that my dad was the first to be there for us financially but lacked so much emotionally and had no realization of the harm that was being done by way of a personality trait defined as a disapproving and dissociative nature. Beyond thinking that this financial help would be a catalyst for my career, he really had very little interest in all my forthcoming endeavors. My parents held an outward “vibe” of disapproval of the more esoteric and eclectic music for which I was becoming known. When I made the commitment to move my endeavors in a more commercially viable direction leading to my being a recording artist on RCA records, my parents then showed great appreciation for the newer repertoire of musical compositions I had written.