Part 14: Misunderstanding Depression - Unacknowledged Grief

For the year that I was back home, my parent’s found it necessary to take in my grandfather - my mom’s dad because since my grandmother’s passing, although keeping up fairly good physical health for surpassing 90, he began showing signs of slowing down. Even with all his disapproval and sporadic verbal abuse towards my grandmother, he missed her terribly and was experiencing woeful remorse. We would hear him crying while sitting in the living room as my parents and I would be finishing dinner in the kitchen, apologizing to my grandmother and telling her how much he is missing her. It was deeply moving and our family unit was not at all in touch with how to be in an environment of such expressions of grief. Quite surprised and emotionally touched, there was one instance that I remember my dad saying something to the affect of how meaningful longterm, intimate relationships evolve as unacknowledged attachment to another person. My dad cared for and loved my mother deeply. He just did not have the skills or insight to express himself in a way emanating from his heart.